At Frank’s Bar, Old Roy poured strong drinks. More to the point, the strength of Roy’s ‘mixers’ breeched the precipice of the ridiculous and poked an intemperate finger into the eye of the obscene. The Bacardi and Cokes that Pa Chili365 and I ordered had a faint whisper of Coca-Cola in an boundless ocean of rum. It was clear that Roy felt uncomfortable around soft drinks. As such, he handled them only minimally. I suspect we’d have been furnished vast goblets of straight rum, were it not for the fact that Roy was hopelessly pedantic. He had to concede that rum and coke by its very definition has two parts- rum and coke. Fortunately for Roy (and to our detriment) the appellation ‘rum and coke’ provides no suggestion for actual ratio of substituents. The good news was that I could crawl home.
Don’t look for Frank’s or Roy. The bar has been bulldozed and Roy is long dead; from cirrhosis, or hepatocellular carcinoma, or fetal alcohol syndrome, or maybe something to do with drinking lots of booze. This is an unfortunate reality as today I seek a bracing cocktail. Running long miles in the cold just isn’t phasing me. I need something with a little extra kick to jar me out of the comfort zone. As the kids are at Grandma’s, what better time to make holiday (chili) side dishes and enjoy a stern cocktail.
1 lb fresh tomatoes
1 T fresh jalapeno
1 T chili powder
2 t Angostura bitters
1 t Worcestershire sauce
1 T lime juice
1 t celery salt
½ t coriander
- Blend everything except the vodka in a blender until smooth.
- Pour 1 C of mix into a glass and add ¼ C vodka and some ice cubes.
- Trick out your drink with some beef jerky (celery is for rabbits, kids).
Out of the blender, the bloody mary mix was thick like salsa. Cutting it with Vodka helped, but more vodka would have resulted in a less viscous mixer (and a more obtuse blogger).
The flavor was good. Spicy. While Mrs. Chili365 was not a fan, I found that the bitters stacked up nicely against the chili flavor resulting in a confidently strong cocktail. By no means was the ABV to ‘Roy’ standards, but mimicry isn’t really my thing. Drinking, though, is. Stick around darling, after the next glass you’ll look even better.