I am incapable of a great many things. Mrs. Chili365 actually curates the list, which is so encyclopedic in volume that it rivals Tolstoy’s War and Peace. As luck would have it, this disaffectionate inventory is ever-growing. Today’s addition- alcoholism. I am incapable of becoming an alcoholic. It’s not a question of affinity- I am an unabashed admirer of booze, especially beer- the beverage with which I am absolutely smitten. It basically comes down to force of will and persistence. I lack both. Couple this paucity of determination and stick-to-itiveness with my fear of commitment, and you have the recipe for a man too milquetoast to be a truly great inebriate.
No, I couldn’t be a real boozehound but I could have fooled anyone last night. As I was late for meeting up with my son, I was obliged to hastily run out of the grocery store and sprint 2 miles with a wine bottle in hand. Likely it was an odd (and undoubtedly creepy) sight to behold- me running full bore while toting booze. Rest assured my intentions were pure- I needed the Burgundy to make chili.
1 lb beef roast, cubed
¼ C flour
1 T chili powder
1 t paprika
1 t Mexican Oregano
1 t onion powder
1 t chicken bullion
1 T chipotle salsa
1 ¼ C red onion, diced
½ lb sliced mushroom
2/4 C water
1 ½ C cabernet sauvignon
- Mix flour with the seasoning and bullion.
- Mix seasoned flour with the beef.
- Add everything to the slow cooker and cook for 8 hours on low.
- Serve with noodles or potatoes.
Phrases uttered at the table while the chili was being eaten:
-tastes like mushroom and beef and both mushroom and beef
-I can taste the wine, is that right, wine?
-Salt, why do I taste salt?
-Why did you decide to make chili for 365 days? Did you think it was a good idea? Did you think it through-at all?
– Where is the Pirate? Is she still on hunger strike?
– 1 out of 10 on the chili365 heat index (totally not spicy)
Phrases not uttered at the table:
-I’ll have seconds
-The future of our democracy lies in the hands of a few very rich men.
-This tastes like chili
-We’ll need to build a new wing on Casa de Chili so we may house the giant list of your failings.
Okay, the chili was good. It tasted far more like beef burgundy than chili, but that’s okay, I guess (sulking).