Zombie Bait Chili Cheese Sandwiches

The insane thing is this, I wanted to make something with bologna. That plan never got off the ground. It had something, at least remotely, to do with the explosion that occurred in our kitchen last night. Having turned down the setting on the stove at the requisite time during the beer brewing process, I never expected a malfunction that would maintain the burner at the “nuclear” high setting. The resulting cascade of green, sticky wort was as charmingly breathtaking as it was apoplectic rage inducing. What does all of this have to do with bologna? None of your business. Let’s just have a moment of silence for the can of Hamms and the smoke alarm that ended up making the ultimate sacrifice.

On to the sandwiches I was able to make. Going for a run immediately after consuming 1 ½ of these bad boys was not in my best interest. Speed work in the world’s hilliest haunted cemetery has no mercy on the over fed. During the fourth of graveyard 800s, I noticed that the sandwiches were sitting like a brick in my stomach. This was no good, as half mile repeats are difficult enough without the intense hills and threat of a zombie attack. By the end of the 5th 800, I was reasonably sure that the sandwiches were bound for the ground. As I set out on the 6th repeat, I began to reason with my now-mutinous stomach. I assured my guts that if they could just hold on, we’d be leaving soon. I wasn’t sure if the sound of a guy ralphing (or if you’re Canadian, booting) would attract zombies or repel them, but I really didn’t feel like hanging around to find out. With a tenacity born of fear, I finished the last half miler and ran home. A 6×800 workout won’t set me glory bound, but at least I left the undulating necropolis with my cerebrum safely in tow.

Day 148 (ate)

1 can refried beans
1 jalapeno pepper, diced
½ t cumin
½ t coriander
½ t onion powder
1T chili powder
1 C cheese

Slices of bread


1) Add beans, pepper, cumin, coriander, onion powder and chili powder. To a pot and mix.
2) Cook over medium heat for 10 minutes, stirring frequently.
3) Add cheese and cook for another 5 minutes, stirring frequently.
4) For each sandwich, spread butter on one side of each of two slices of bread.
5) Place one slice of buttered bread on a frying pan (buttered side down) over medium heat.
6) Spread chili on top of the bread and top the chili with second piece of buttered bread (buttered side up).
7) Fry on pan for 5 minutes, then flip sandwich.
8) Fry another 5 minutes.
9) Serve with fries.

Zombie Bait Chili Cheese Sandwiches

Zombie Bait Chili Cheese Sandwiches

Tasting Notes:

The truth is, this sandwich tasted pretty good. Think of it as a grilled cheese, except with chili flavored refried beans. They’ll take a while to digest, so wait 30 minutes before swimming, jumping on a trampoline, or battling the undead. The ITP liked the zombie bait chili cheese sandwiches, but didn’t love them. Perhaps their survival instincts are finally manifest?

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3 Responses to Zombie Bait Chili Cheese Sandwiches

  1. AgileWriter says:

    Fond of sandwiches?
    Try Grilled Vegan Sandwiches + Homemade Vegan Cream Cheese

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